Monday, August 30, 2010


I was looking through my Elmo's Party Cricut cartridge one day last week, trying to come up with stuff to make for Curly Girly's upcoming birthday party. For those of you unfamiliar with a Cricut book, each page shows what is on a particular button, and there are several choices for each button. So on the page I was looking at, there were assorted Elmo parts and the letter T from the Elmo font. Curly Girly comes up to me (because she has super Elmo radar), points to the page, and says "T."

"T, T, T."

My husband turns around and stares at her at this point, and we are both thinking it is a coincidence. So I turn the page, where there is an O up top and a P down the bottom, and she says, "P, P, P." At this point, she has boggled both of our little brains, trying to figure out if she really knows any letters at age 23 months or she is just lucky. So I go through the pages, one letter at a time, and she pointed to them and got at least half of them right!

She does have a Dr. Seuss "ABC" book, and a small Elmo alphabet board book, but those aren't her favorites and we don't read them too her often. I certainly haven't been teaching her letters, since I figured that would come much later. Our best guess is that she learned these letters from watching too much Sesame Street. And all this time I thought she wasn't paying attention to anything but Elmo, since she runs around so much. Since then, I have gotten out her package of foam letters and numbers, and she seems very interested in them, pointing out letters and acting very proud of herself. And of course, Mummy and Daddy are very proud of her too.

Who needs parents when you have Elmo? :)

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Consignment shopping

Curly Girly is growing like a weed, so we took her to the consignment store yesterday in search of good clothes. Sure, I could take her to Walmart or Target or K-Mart, but why pay $5 for a t-shirt when I can get a gently used one for $1-2, and she won't notice the difference? On our last trip, in March, we got her a cute purple Nike sweatsuit for like $6! I found the same thing online, brand new, for over $30.

Yesterday's trip was just for clothes, but we ended up buying more than that. We found a pink and white Little Tikes plastic table (for some reason it has pink Ikea stools instead of pink chairs) for only $20. There was a grey Little Tikes table with drawers and matching chairs that we liked better, but it was $40, and Curly Girly went straight to the pink one anyway! Then, my husband found one of those Kid Tough cameras for only $10. New, those things sell for $40-50. Kiddo doesn't care what color it is, she just likes cameras, but this one happens to be pink, and she loves it- she carried it around all day yesterday.The last non-clothes item we found was a bag of plastic dishes, perfect for her toy kitchen. It seemed to be items from random sets but they vaguely match, and there is even a coffee pot that makes noise!

As for the clothes, we found plenty of those too. We got her 2 dresses, 3 pairs of pants, 1 sweatshirt, 1 sweater, 1 windbreaker, about 6 shirts, and even 4 pairs of cute little Elmo undies! I was holding clothes up to her when we got home and she had the biggest smile on her face!

Grand total for the clothes and all of her other fun things was $78! If I went to a regular store, I probably couldn't even get her that many pieces of clothing. There were things we wanted but decided against (like a tricycle for $40- a similar one to one I can get at work for $40, plus use my discount and get it for cheaper), so it helps to know what things run brand new so you don't overpay. All of the clothes I got were hardly worn and look great. At the store I went to (and also others I have been to), I have even found items with the original store tags on them! Brand new stuff for cheap! I'm not really the most seasoned consignment shopper but I have been buying clothes for my daughter that way since before she was worn, and she has gotten compliments on some of the outfits I have bought at consignment stores.

On a sort of but not really related note, Curly Girly loved her new table so much that she colored all over it in ball point pen. To clean it: soap and water didn't work well, baby wipes didn't work well, Goo Gone helped a bit more, and Mr. Clean Magic Erasers took the rest off! I really ought to keep a supply of those things around the house. :)


P.S. I had mentioned on my Twitter about some of my good finds, and someone gave me the link to a place called Consignment Mommies ( It has lists of consignment sales, articles about the best way to shop those sales, and even how to repurpose clothes that have seen better days. I am not crafty and handy enough to fix clothes, but it was a really interesting article, and the site is worth a look!

Greetings from my Elmo nightmare.

No interesting or "funny" stories or dirty Sesame Street jokes today. We finally decided on a day for Curly Girly's 2nd birthday party, so I have been up to my eyeballs in Elmo eyeballs (and noses, and mouths, and other assorted Elmo bits). I am finally getting some use out of my Cricut that I bought recently! I have the Elmo's party cartridge (of course, and it's the only cartridge I've bought for it so far) and I am putting it to use. Last night I assembled birthday invitations last night at like 2AM (except for one defective Elmo hiney which I need to recut) and I am happy with them. They have pop-up Elmos inside! Tonight at about 1AM , I assembled 22 Elmo rectangles that will become a banner once I string them all together. They say "Happy Birthday [Curly Girly]" and they turned out nicely!

What's up next for the Cricut? Elmo name tags for the goody bags, thank you notes, and perhaps Elmo faces to put onto party hats if I can find red party hats. Finding party hats is apparently difficult, since Walmart stopped carrying them and so did the local party supply store. Guess I will be ordering them online. While my Cricut adventures don't look professional like they show on TV, I am happy with what I have made so far. After the kiddo's birthday, I will post pictures of the Elmo madness. With all the Elmos I have glued together thus far, it's a wonder I don't dream about being red and furry and wake up in a cold sweat.

In non-Muppet news, Curly Girly and I went to see Millie again. She was much more cheerful this week, and showed Catherine some birds that the nursing home has. Curly Girly wanted to get to the birds so bad that I had to keep her from banging on the glass. Millie's son and daughter-in-law were there visiting too so we all looked at birds and had a chat. Curly Girly got lots of comments on her curls, of course. We are planning on going again next week to see her. Her daughter-in-law said hopefully Millie will be out of there in a few short weeks, so prayers and good thoughts for her speedy recovery!

Now, it is insanely late and I should be resting up to chase after the kiddo again tomorrow. Assembling more Elmo stuff will probably wait until this weekend on my days off from work.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Doing the Snuffleupagus

As you well know, my kiddo is always either watching Sesame Street, or whining, "Elmo! Elmo peeeasssse!" I like to make lame jokes about the show all the time. I love Sesame Street, and I grew up watching it, but now that I'm grown up it just seems funnier. It's sort of interesting looking at the show you loved as a kid from a grown up point of view.

Kiddo was watching a Sesame Street DVD, and this particular clip was of Mr. Snuffleupagus teaching people his dance through a song. Before he starts singing, he says, "My mom says that anyone can do the Snuffleupagus." And my husband, who usually rolls his eyes when I make dirty Sesame Street jokes, says,

"I'm pretty sure that's illegal in all 50 states."

I'm sure at this point you may want to high five him, but you can't through the computer, so I'll do it for you. Now I have to up my game and come up with some better jokes.

Friday, August 20, 2010


Old people like to talk about their bowels. I am not sure why this is. I had an elderly lady talking to me about her bowel problems today. She then asked if I was coming home with her and looked very disappointed when I said I was working and couldn't leave. She's not the most "with it" but that doesn't explain why she went into full detail about her poo problems.

I'd like to say that this is an isolated instance, but this isn't the first old lady to tell me about their bodily functions of the hiney area. And I'm pretty sure it won't be the last.


Tuesday, August 17, 2010


I have a friend named Millie. She is a little old lady. An awesome little old lady. She is 77 years young. She is almost completely blind but still cooks her own meals, lives by herself at home, and walks around her kitchen island to get exercise. She is thin but concerned about letting herself go. She always wears matching outfits, and must have had them a long time if she knows what to put together without seeing them. She watches (well, listens to, anyway) Lawrence Welk on Saturday nights while eating a Banquet tv dinner. She tells stories of her dad who was a music teacher, her husband, her four children, and growing up in Nebraska.

Now, I don't go actively looking for little old ladies as friends. Millie and I just happened to find each other at my work. She needed help getting around the store to buy things, and I like to walk around. I think I was pregnant with Curly Girly the first time I helped her, and at that point walking around really helped me out since I was swelling all up. She walked around the store and I held onto the cart, guiding her around and reading item labels and prices for her. When it came time for her to pay, she had her money all set up where she could find it, and she trusted me with her wallet and checkbook.

I last helped Millie around in June. Her Wednesday visits were habit to me. The other workers "saved" Millie for me, and even if I was on break, she would wait for me to come back. I went on vacation the last week of June, and when I came back, she didn't come in. "Next week," I thought to myself, and worried to myself even though Millie was fairly healthy and active. What if she decided she liked another store better? What if she was broke and needed help (I knew she had hardly any money)? What if she was sick? I waited Wednesday after Wednesday. No Millie. I looked up her phone number and tried to call her. The number had gotten disconnected. At this point I was really starting to freak out.

I went in on Saturday on my day off to pick up some milk and bread. And there I saw her! Millie was there, in a wheelchair, with her daughter in law, doing some quick shopping. I asked her what had happened and she seemed pretty upset. She had some illness that seemed fairly minor to her (her daughter in law seemed to mention it was a little more serious), and got put in the hospital. From there, she got sent to a nursing home. "My kids put me in there!" she said sadly. I found out she was staying fairly close to where I live and I said I could visit her if she didn't mind seeing Curly Girly too, which of course she didn't. Today, I loaded up Curly Girly in the stroller and walked over to see her.

I found Millie in the dining room (tried to get there early but I fail, oops), sitting with a couple friends but looking rather angry. I said "Hi, Millie!" and she sort of snapped at me until she realized who it was. And when she found out Curly Girly was there too, she brightened up. She was really upset to be there, and asked how the weather was, and if we had walked over. She asked how I was, what new things Curly Girly was doing, and how my husband was, and if he had found a job yet. She told me she was doing her therapy every day, trying her best to meet all the requirements to go home. She says she needs to get out in a month or she will lose her house. I don't know the specifics of why she is there or whether or not she will be getting out soon. I stayed there maybe a half hour talking to her, until the wee one got antsy and wanted to leave. We gave her a picture that Curly Girly colored to brighten up her room- I figured even if she can't see it, she would appreciate it, and Curly Girly cutely said, "Byebye! See ya!" and waved.

As we left, I was stopped a few times by little old ladies oohing and aahing over Curly Girly and her hair, and she would wave and say "Byebye!" as we walked away. I felt sad leaving Millie all bummed out, but Cury Girly seemed to brighten the day for a lot of people.

So why am I telling you this long story? Because I wanted to tell you that it doesn't take much to help someone out or make their day a little better. I didn't set out to make friends with little old people. Nursing homes sort of give me the willies a little bit. But I found an unexpected friend, and it only takes a little effort to cheer her up.

My own grandparents (dad's parents) were in nursing homes for many years, but I didn't get out to visit them often. I visited my Grandpa a few times in there before he passed away, but it made me so sad to think of him in there because I knew how much he hated it, and I didn't make it in there often to see him. The last time I saw him was on his birthday, 4 months before he died. We ate little ice cream cups and the nurses went on about his pretty blue eyes and great personality. By the time my grandmother was full time in a nursing home (from assisted living), I had moved 2000 miles away and couldn't readily go visit her. The last time I saw her was when I went to Massachusetts last June to see family. Curly Girly was just wee and non-curly at the time, and no one had met her yet so we were rushing around trying to see everyone we could in just a week. We made the trip to New Hampshire to see my Grandma, and boy am I glad I did. Of course, I didn't know it at the time, but that would be the last time I would see my Grandma.  She seemed in good health, but soon after I went home, she took a turn for the worse and she died 2 months later. Curly Girly had a good time visiting her Great Grandma- she was fascinated with the tennis balls on her walker, and we got a picture of the three of us, which turned out really nice and I still like to look at it. I'm not sure if things would have gone differently if I had known it was our last visit with her; I am just glad that we had a good time and I have good memories of that visit.

Take time to visit your loved ones, young and old, sick or healthy, because you never know when the last time you will see someone will be. Make friends with someone new and unexpected, because you never know when someone really cool will cross your path. And be nice to people, because you never know when you might make a difference or make someone's life a little easier or happier.


Sunday, August 15, 2010


There's not much to do here out in the cornfields of Nebraska, so I watch too much tv and ponder strange things. Lately, I've been pondering mullets. You all know what I'm talking about- that bodaciously awful hairstyle- "business in the front, party in the back." I spent 3 years living in Wyoming, and now I've been in Nebraska over 3 years, so I've seen mullets here and there. (I've also seen a plethora of cowboy styled outfits, but that's a rambling for another time.)

I can't imagine why people think that mullets are cool- I just know that some people like them. I'm not judging on their hairstyle today, honest. Rock your own style, and feel free to think my (non-mullet, in case you're wondering) hair or clothes are freaky. My pondering is more about how they obtain their mullet.

Do people go to a stylist to get their mullet? I mean, I can't imagine going to a stylist and asking for one, but some must be mullet experts, right? Or is the wonder and usefulness of mullet-y goodness that it is easy to create and maintain. Do they cut it themselves? Do they own a Flowbee? I could imagine that a mullet is fairly easy as far as hairstyles go, because if you're cutting it yourself, you don't have to worry about cutting the hair in the back of your hair, and only worry about the part you can see. No more calling your little sister in to help you out and hoping she doesn't give you a bald spot or cut you with scissors!

Everyone, feel free to tell me what you think about mullets, but what I really want to know is how mullet wearers get their hairstyle. I'm curious!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

On why I should keep my big yap shut.

My husband was watching tv the other night, which means I have to suffer through "nerd programming." Last night's selection was an episode of "Warehouse 13." He has it set up to record every week, which means I get to watch it every week. Meanwhile, I have no idea what it's about, since I space out as soon as it comes on. I would assume it might have something to do with warehouses? :) It's on SyFy channel, so that should give you at least a vague idea of the kind of show it is.

The reason I can't tell you anything about the show is that it's lame, so I can't pay attention to it even if I try. Occasionally, I will snap back into reality to watch a scene, after while I will complain about the bad acting, my husband will grumble me, and I will zone out again. This happened last night. I watched about a minute, complained that the actors looked like the were reading off of cue cards, and spaced back out again. But before I did, I managed to post the following comment on Twitter:

 "So I know that *I* can't act, but seriously, Warehouse 13 has the worst acting! Can't see why my husband likes this show so much."

I love Twitter. I'm a little addicted to it. I use it to enter contests (I've won a few things, like diapers, cereal, a necklace, a notebook, etc.), and also to Tweet about any random comment that pops into my head. I usually grumble about lame reality tv, mention something cute the baby did, or make perverted Sesame Street comments. It's basically like talking to a wall, since my followers are mostly company accounts (aka ads) or family members. That's ok. I don't mind making silly comments to nobody. :)

Anyhow, before I went to bed, I checked my Twitter and saw this comment in response to my Warehouse 13 grumbling:

" 'Cuz he's one smart S.O.B.? ;)) Go Warehouse 13!"

I chuckled to my husband because I figured some random Warehouse 13 fan got all uppity about my comment and decided to be funny. For some reason, my husband asked who sent it, and I was like, "I don't know, some random dude, Eddie McClintock?"

At this point, my husband nearly has a cow and was like "WHAT?!" and I didn't see the big deal, until I looked at this dude's profile and see a green check mark. Now if you use Twitter, you already know what that means. If you don't, I will explain. Green check mark means a verified account, and you can't get a verified account unless you are sort of a big deal. It's basically proving you are who you say you are, and generally only celebrities get the fancy green check.

My husband then says, "That's the guy who you said can't act!"

Oops! My bad. I sent him back a Tweet saying that I can't act so what do I know, and that he and my husband win. At this point I felt sort of dumb...I didn't think an actor would do a Twitter search of his own show and stumble upon my comment. Sheesh!

My husband was jealous that I got a response back, so I sent a message to Mr. McClintock asking if he could please sent a Tweet to my husband because he would totally have a cow. I didn't tell my husband I was doing this, and the following message made his night...

"If your wife's having trouble watching me on Warehouse 13, try plying her w/ cocktails first. It works on my wife every time!"

I think my husband almost had a geek attack, and he might just like me a little more for getting Eddie McClintock to talk to him. I may not like the show, but I think Eddie McClintock has gotten himself another fan. Super nice! (And I should stop complaining about tv shows, haha)

(And if you don't believe me, feel free to follow me on Twitter @duckyone. You'll see what I'm talking about!)

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I like how I'm a mind reader.

So I got called in to work tonight since another unnamed individual likes to turn their two days off into three fairly regularly. Since my husband is currently jobless and we need the money, I am more than willing to come in and help out. Although I am still convinced that I should just have money given to me on account of I am awesome, but I digress. :)

Of course when I get to work, they steal back the cashier they had running the returns desk and I was all alone. And of course when I am alone, it is the busiest Tuesday known to man, at least by Nebraska standards. I had a nice long line, and things were moving smoothly enough that by the time management decided I needed help, my boss only helped one customer before I got the line down. It was busy enough that I couldn't get to the phone right away or even pick up after myself right away. 

A dude from another department came up there, which is normal because they drop stuff off for customers to buy or take their returns. I notice after a minute that he is standing behind me. He's not saying a word, making any sort of motion, or doing much of anything, save breathing. I finish up with a customer, turn around to look at him and generally acknowledge his presence, and then turn forward again and call for the next customer. All of a sudden, the dude goes, "I hate customer service workers so much!" and walks away.

So here I am, looking all like ???? and I say to him as he is walking away, "What do you need?" I'm not sure what he needed because his grumblings weren't loud enough as he kept walking away. I still don't know what he wanted. I may have a college degree but I am not psychic! Dude, next time you want something, try saying hi or telling me what you want instead of hovering behind me and then storming away and being rude. Seriously.

-duckyone (who thinks tomorrow will be better!)

Monday, August 9, 2010

Addicted to YouTube

Due to the lack of decent summer tv programming, and the bummed out-ness of my husband losing his job last week, I have been watching YouTube videos for entertainment. It's great, because all the videos are short, so I can watch videos when I'm not completely busy with my toddler. Plus, I have an iPod Touch so I can watch these videos wherever I want, including on the toilet should I so please. (No, I don't really want to sit on the toilet and watch videos, but knowing I can is sort of cool.) My favorite stuff to watch is funny stuff, 80s shows, and anime, so if anyone out there has suggestions, my eyes and ears are open to new stuff to watch! Here are a few of my favorites, in no particular order:

1. FAILBlog: short videos of people doing stupid stuff. Usually videos are less than a minute long so they are great for a quick laugh.

2. Smosh: Ok, so I feel like a giant follower since they are like the 5th most subscribed on YouTube or something like that, but there's a reason why people like them. It's funny! Smosh is Ian Hecox and Anthony Padilla, 2 silly guys who like to make videos with dumb humor. If you want to see people having food battles with pink sprinkle donuts and taquitos, then this is the channel for you! If you're not into stupid stuff, then you probably wouldn't find it funny.

3. ShaneDawsonTV: Another very popular channel- 2nd or 3rd most watched I think. Shane Dawson is one funny dude. He does a lot of his characters on his own. He does use a lot of bad language, especially during his skits, but if you watch the beginning and end of his videos, he seems like a funny but sweet guy. He must be doing something right, he just won a Teen Choice Award! If you like him, he has other channels as well- ShaneDawsonTV2 is where he posts answers to viewers questions.

4. Fred: I don't follow "Fred Figgelhorn" (played by Lucas Cruikshank) but I watch his videos now and then. You may have seen him on Nickelodeon or Disney Channel. I saw him on Disney, on Hannah Montana as a guy who did cartoon voices. His character, Fred, is supposed to be a squeaky voiced 6-ish year old with a weird family life. If you can handle a dude who sounds like a deranged chipmunk, you might like it. I can only handle it once in a while.

Those are my current things to watch, but I like to watch different stuff all the time, so I'm open to ideas of what to watch next. I'd like to hear what other people think is funny or entertaining...


Tuesday, August 3, 2010

What should I do when I grow up?

So my husband goes into work today, and they give him a choice- take an over $2 an hour pay cut (plus losing the mandatory overtime, so instead of 48 hours he won't even be guaranteed 40), or get fired. Not sure what we will do yet but needless to say, I will most likely be going back to full time in the near future. But just because I am odd, here is my list of possible different jobs to try out.

1. Land pirate- I'm in Nebraska, meaning I cannot go sailing the seven seas in search of dubloons and treasure and whatnot. So I'm thinking a ship on wheels is more my style, looting and pillaging and shaking down old ladies for their prune juice money and extra peppermints. Yarrr! Then, once I'm established and my treasure chest be full o' booty, I will start merchandising. Peanut Butter Pirate Puffs cereal,  anyone? How about a line of juices called Grog (and Grog Light for the nutrition conscious?) Also lime pies. We don't want anyone getting scurvy.

2. Giant ugly foot model- Have you ever seen the episode of King of the Hill where Peggy Hill becomes a foot model? She thinks it is to make big footed people feel beautiful but it turns out to be a foot fetish website? Yeah. I may not have size 16 1/2 feet, but my size 11s are plenty big enough to be laughed at.

3. Start a YouTube channel of videos of Nebraska- 5 minutes of just staring into a corn field and watching corn grow? I'm allllll over that. It could be all about corn! Watching corn, planting corn, cooking corn, eating corn...Oh wait, I'm allergic to corn. That may not be such a good plan. Nothing like wheezing, peeling skin, and terrible stomachaches to make a good day stinky (and literally stinky- the stomach thing means some not-so-pleasant gas).

Anyone have any good ideas for what we should do about the job situation? Serious or silly. I sure could use a laugh tonight!